i’m drunk and my whole body feels numb, but in the good way. i cant decide whether im happy or sad, work is shit, but i had a girl sleep at mine last week and it was really nice and it was kinda like the movies. i wanna live in the movies, like fall in love like peter parker and mary-jane watson, or clark kent and lois lane, that kind of life. i hope that i’ll find what im looking for, that i’ll find the job i want or find a passion that i can pursue. i hope i find someone that i can love and they’ll love and we’ll pretend we’re in the movies together. i dont know when that will happen, i’m not in a rush, i’m 19, i hope to have my whole life ahead of me to find the perfect person that will complete me. you’re out there, i’m yet to meet you. i look forward to when i do.
nothing is going right for me. my life aint bad, but just shit keeps happening. start with i got led on by this girl who i actually care about, and now idk what to do about her. i didnt think i liked her that much but i guess i actually do. she admitted that she goes for guys that treat her like shit, and has no idea why she doesnt go for “nice guys” like me, but she still continues to go after guys that are wankers. secondly my debit card gets eaten by a hole in the wall, so now i have no access to my money, so i’m kinda broke until i get a new debit card. my job is shit, i dont like working for the company i work for, but tomorrow i have to go back to working there for the foreseeable future until i can get a new job. and to put the icing on the cake, my brother comes home from work with my car, and the gear box is totally fucked. i only renewed the insurance last week for over £800, which is over half the worth of the car. now it looks like im going to have to fork out anywhere between £200 and £1000 pounds on getting a new gearbox, or spend upwards of £1000 on buying a new car.